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Notice to newcomers

You may be unaware of the continuing controversy surrounding my choice of apparel when job hunting. If you don’t get the references to Trammps and red leather codpieces, please use the Search facility for clarification

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Some weeks ago a friend was recommending my blog to some of her own followers. Very nice of her, so thanks very much. In doing so, she used the following terms.

Irreverent.’ I can’t fault her there.

Black humour.’ An element of truth, I suppose.

Politically incorrect.’ I bridled slightly at that as you may well imagine, being as I am a founder member of Cycling Treehuggers for Whales Against the Bomb. Fair enough, I like the odd Essex girl joke now and then, but politically incorrect? Me?

In order to re-establish my credentials, and indeed my credibility, I’ve got myself a new job. Yes, I donned my Trammps suit and my LarryBlackman’u’Like red leather codpiece, went for the interview and, in common parlance, strolled it. I am now Head of Political Awareness at the Hollywood-based Performance Arts Special Support for Filmmakers Artistes and Repertoire Trends. Despite its unfortunate acronym, PASSFART has real political and economic clout, and the film industry’s movers and shakers are doing just that; moving (their bowels mainly) and shaking.

Hollywood loves a good remake. Unfortunately they haven’t really mastered the art, and most are not good remakes at all; they are atrociously awful remakes. They run up against an additional problem today that was not present back when the originals were released. Increasing pressure to release films that are non sexist, non ageist, non justaboutanythingist. So they now have to contend with titles that give only the barest indication of the much loved original versions.

Which is where PASSFART comes in. Our job is to oversee the industry to ensure standards are maintained. PASSFART hits hard, and it hits very early in the film making process. So far, these particular remakes have been allowed to get as far as storyboard.

The Ghost and individual in her own right Muir

Person Midship-person Hornblower

Ten Native Americans of Restricted Growth

Play Msty for Me

The Breton Separatist Connection

Visually Impaired Date

The Railway Small Adults with their own needs and rights

Differently Mentally Abled, the flying elephant

Afro Caribbean, but you must learn to stop being judgemental about the horse’s physical appearance

The Subjugational Heteronomy Strikes Back

Polluting Aerial Transport, Lovely Trains, And Hugely Wasteful Individual Road Vehicles

ParentalsiblingzThe Godparent

Conceptually Outdated Social Stratification of ‘44

Dirty Harriet

Whisky Personore

The Bellringer of Notre Dame, who is not kyphotic, he suffers from kyphosis

Markerboard Jungle

The Socially Deprived Ones

Faline

If you require further clarification on any of these, please feel free to contact me or any member of PASSFART.