The first analysis I did of the search terms that people used to end up here on nobodysreadingme was a surprise hit, so I’m going to surf the zeitgeist here.

  1. marijuana ice cream my boyfriends prayer. Well I sort of see what the edge is here, but I have no idea at all what post they must have ended up on. I’ve never mentioned marijuana on my blog, which is mildly surprising.
  2. marketing research proposal on sandals I have a suspicion where this one would have ended up, but I’m deeply worried that anybody should even contemplate market research on sandals. Maybe they meant Sandals, the swanky all-inclusive holiday company?
  3. rhinos maids Must have found several references to maid’s day off, and also to how not to be killed by a rhinoceros, but what sort of disease state would lead anybody to juxtapose these two subjects?
  4. no more mr right guy 40 days This is a genuine puzzler. I’ve no idea where it led, and what’s with the 40 days thing? Somebody giving up being nice for Lent?
  5. that my lifer has not been in vain Pleasingly metaphysical air to this one, don’t you think? But it has to be said my blog may not be the right place to explore the deeper aspects of the human condition. Pirates, yes, philosophers not so much.
  6. I hate mixer taps Quite right too, so do I. This plaintive protest would have gone to Radio Ga Ga and my sounding off about Ulrika Jonson. You have to have read it to make any sense of that, so get weaving.
  7. fibre fib health foods can make you fatter One of my rants about the Daily Express would be the landing site here, but it’s a worryingly precise set of search terms isn’t it? A bit disturbing. Or is it just me?
  8. daylight wasting time uk I did an entire post about this concept back in October. Two minds with but a single thought.
  9. “that underground dining thing” I’m a bit worried by the quote marks here. Signs of a possible obsessive personality? Might be. And as to where they got to on my blog, well your guess is as good as mine.
  10. deftinitions Now this is definitely troubling me. ‘Deftinitions’ is a neologism that I coined back in the late 1990s. It’s my word. So how come some complete stranger is using it as a search term? Do I have an anonymous stalker? I’ll be keeping my windows locked until further notice.
  11. who much sugar in a normal cup of tea? Slightly surreal, this. I mean, if it were how much sugar, I could see where they were going, but who much? Very pleasing. I think the landing site here would be the post where I beat up the Americans for not being able to make a decent brew. And the French. And the Dutch.
  12. cap de agde part 2 What? What was that? If anybody can shed any light on this I’ll be very grateful. And it must have got me at least one pageview, so I’ll not look a gift horse in the mouth.
  13. site:wordpress.com dogging This one unsettles me. Firstly the enquiry itself. Really, who wants to know about dogging? And if you do, WordPress is an unlikely source of enlightenment; there must be any number of sites that Google would pick up. Secondly, how the hell do they get to my blog. This is a topic I have sadly neglected; not a single reference anywhere. Most odd.
  14. rocky marciano figurene Despite the tipping errot, this has to have landed on my post ‘What’s in a name?’ which features both Rocky Marciano, and Beryl Streep, who collects china figurines. Whoever googled this deserved all they got I reckon. Learn to spell why don’t you?
  15. old fogies having children Another puzzler. The term ‘fogies’ doesn’t appear anywhere on my blog. Not once. However, if spelt the correct way, ‘fogeys,’ it must have led to ‘Old fogeys? Ignore them children and have some fun.’ Aww, bless.
  16. Black pudding salt lake city utah Another pleasingly surreal set of search terms, no? I’ve written at length about black pudding and Salt Lake City and Utah, but as far as I know I’ve never combined the black pudding idea with the epicentre of the LDS. I hope whoever was searching found what they were looking for.
  17. dreadlocks precautions Well, this really is anybody’s guess isn’t it? It sounds like a wise idea though. If you have dreads, take precautions. I’m not sure what against but hey! Smart move as it stands methinks.
  18. knoberke. dead and naked Not a clue. Not even an inkling what this one is about. Knoberke, whatever he, she, or it is, has never had a starring role on my blog. Even Google is at a loss here. Please make sure all search terms are spelled correctly. Well I would if I knew what the hell it was supposed to be. And why specifically dead and naked? I find that a bit of a worry.
  19. group ufpt 60s Nope you got me there. Wrong blog, wrong guy. Better luck next time eh?
  20. stid stands for Sorry mate, I’d help you if I could, but I don’t know. STD could be subscriber trunk dialling or sexually transmitted disease, but I don’t think either of those will lead to the parting of the clouds of confusion in your head.
  21. Bonus Ball! This one arrived when I’d finished the post, but is too good to miss. brothels in llantrisant What can I say? Yes I’ve mentioned Llantrisant, but brothels? Not as far as I’m aware.