It’s been a good few days for selfie stories. Two were encouraging, one not.

You all know my opinions on the preening narcissists who are so convinced that the world is fascinated in them their life is not complete without posting a zillion selfies a day. I once had to Unfriend somebody on Facebook because her posts consisted entirely of photographs of herself with lots of exclamation marks, and the comments from her sycophantic mates going ‘MMMMMM! LUSH!’ and going apeshit with the heart emojis. She was far from unattractive, but she didn’t pass the pub test.

Back to the news. Please raise your glasses to Miranda Rader. She hails from Bryan, Texas, and for reasons that are unclear decided it would be a good idea to take a selfie while she was driving. A topless selfie, no less. Anyway, she hit another car, which is both unsurprising and unfortunate. Doubly unfortunate in that it was a cop car. She got busted for hitting the car, then we got the icing on the cake. A/ she was pissed (bad bad bad) and got slapped with a DUI, and B/ she was 19 years old, and charged with possessing alcohol while a minor.

That latter one seems harsh to me. The average age of a combat soldier in Vietnam was 19, so you can get killed or maimed for your country but not have a beer.

Now some more heartening news. According to Amazon and John Lewis, sales of selfie sticks have plunged by over 50%. If you’re not a Brit, John Lewis is a large chain of retail stores, and their sales performance is regarded as a bellwether for UK sales full stop. Also, encouragingly, a recent bit of research (Danger Will Robinson! Danger!) suggests that about 80% of people think selfie sticks are embarrassing and/or annoying, so maybe social pressure is driving them to extinction. Not before time, in my view. They’re the work of Satan.

Now the not so encouraging news. In fact it’s downright OFFS news. Many people now regard taking pictures of what they’re about to eat as perfectly normal and acceptable. That’s a bit of a matter of opinion, especially if they then post them to Facebook captioned ‘Nom nom nom!’ That despicable bit of nursery talk from sentient adults always raises my blood pressure. One of my mates does it just to annoy me.

It gets worse. More research (usual caveat) suggests that over 30% of 18 to 24 year olds would regard their evening ‘ruined’ if they were unable to take and post pictures of their nosh.

Nom nom nom!