Now you have all settled into the concept of the wonderful world of spannerdom, another story from last week. This is brilliant.

A man who resides on the French Riviera is considering suing Uber to the tune of £38m. That’s some serious dosh, isn’t it? I suppose if you live on the Riviera you’re used to having a few bob in your pocket, and a bit more never hurts.

Said Monsieur was indulging in a bit of hankypanky, and being a spanner called Uber to arrange transport to the home of the target of his nefarious shagging. So far so good. Except he stupidly used his wife’s phone to do so. Classic spannerdom. Almost as if he wanted to get found out.

Now for reasons that are unclear, although he claims to have logged out of the app, Madame Monsieur kept getting updates from Uber, put two and two together, and divorced him on the grounds of his infidelity.

This is moderately surprising, since our Gallic cousins tend to have a fairly laissez faire attitude to extramarital nookie. They do the shrug thing and get on with life. Rarely much of an issue, just a bit of mild irritation, a row, then back to normal.

Then we have the extraordinarily high price that Monsieur has placed on his marriage. Either she’s red-hot between the sheets (unlikely given his misdemeanour with the mistress) or she’s the money in the now-fractured marriage and he’s feeling the pinch a bit.

Or he’s a money-grubbing pit of entitlement refusing to face up to the fact that it’s not Uber’s fault. It’s his. If he hadn’t been playing away, there’d have been nothing to find out. While he’s at it, he could face up to the fact he’s a Grade A spanner for using his wife’s phone in the first place.

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