I’ll keep this short. It’s Sunday, and I know your time is precious.

Last Wednesday I received confirmation of something a lot of you may have suspected for some time. I’m a jerk. One of my Facebook correspondents told me I am, so it must be true, mustn’t it? Anything on the internet is true de facto.

Here’s how it came about. One of my writer friends was banging on about the importance of syntax and grammar in writing. She then committed the schoolgirl error of responding to a query from me thus.

‘My main – my sole – criteria is…’

Well I wasn’t going to let that go without comment, was I? What can a poor boy do?

‘There’s a noun/verb disagreement. Criteria is plural. Is is singular.’

That’s when her rapier like wit came into play.

‘You know you’re a jerk.’

I might have put a comma after ‘know,’ but whatever. I probably didn’t help things when I replied, ‘I know I’m a jerk. It’s genetic on my father’s side.’ Silence has since reigned.

Oh yes, I’m also a ‘brainwashed sheeple’ because I scienced the crap out of a post about chemtrails. Sore losers eh? Dontcha just love them?