1. Kirk Douglas (captain, carried over from 2017)
  2. Jimmy Tarbuck
  3. Robert Mugabe
  4. Lionel Blair, dragged back from 2016
  5. Judith Chalmers
  6. Jimmy Carter
  7. Harry Belafonte
  8. Tina Turner
  9. Cleo Laine
  10. Alfred Frankland, populariser of the pollen count and Hygiene Theory
  11. James Fox
  12. Frederick Forsyth
  13. Tony Britton
  14. Yoko Ono
  15. Chris Rea
  16. Henry Kissinger
  17. Doris Day
  18. Giles Brandreth
  19. TFF. He’s come off the reserves’ bench because I think somebody might make a determined effort to take him out.
  20. Dave Prowse

PLEASE NOTE. Rule changes for the 2018 season. Midyear, there will be a one week transfer window. Team members who are still surviving can be exchanged with other Listers, or simply sacked and have substitutes brought in. Deceased members cannot be subbed.

BTW Kev and I looked set for a 3-3 draw, then Jake Lamotta stepped up to the plate for me and put me 4-3 up.