Sorry boys and girls, I’m just not functional today. So here’s a reblog

nobodysreadingme

You may, or may not, I suppose, remember the scandal I blogged about a few years ago regarding the dangers of wearing heavy earrings. You run the risk of your ears ageing prematurely. Needless to say, some charlatan had come up with a (very expensive) unguent to treat this urgent, First World, problem. You can probably still get this ridiculous ‘cure’ on Goop, which remains ‘More Money Than Sense Central.’

Then there was the horror of ‘smartphone neck.’ This is another First World problem. Hours hunched over your smartphone will apparently give you a wrinkly neck that resembles turkey wattles*. I doubt your average teen is going to fret too much about that, since we all know teens are immortal, but a cosmetic company spotted a marketing opportunity and picked on Yummymummies.. They launched not one, not two, but three moisturisers to combat this scourge. Clever target demographic, since I…

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